Nothing fills my little black heart more than being in the right a 100% with a stranger. Hotspots for such moments of euphoria are usually shop queues. Luckily for me I have children, so I go to the shop about 15 times a day so my chances of such an encounter are high.
As I left Lidl the other day feeling a bit anti climatic as it had been an event free trip I saw something fantastic. A man on his own, with no children parked in a parent and children spot. Brilliant. My mood immediately lifted. Here was my opportunity to put him in his place. My opportunity to tell him that I was completely right, and he should feel eternally gratefully that a chance meeting with me set him on the right path. No kids no parking. Simple. The conversation went as follows:
Me: Excuse me. Do you mind telling me (note: it’s not do you mind me asking? Already going in for the fight) why you’re parked in a parent and children spot?
(Had just watch the Oasis Documentary Supersonic as well so I was proper channeling Our Kid)
Man: What business is it of yours?
Me: Well I’m here with children and I couldn’t park in that spot because of you
Man: I’m perfectly entitled to park here
Me: No, you’re not
Man: I’m disabled, and the manager lets me park here because its nearer to the door
(slightly rattled now but checks for disabled parking permit)
Me: Well I don’t see your disabled parking thing
Man: I don’t have to have it on display unless I’m in a disabled spot (AS HE WHIPS OUT THE DISABLED PARKING YOKE FROM BEHIND HIS MIRROR!!!)
Me: Well… I mean, you’ve…. you’ve no kids though
Man: Ask the manager
Me: Yeah, well maybe I will
Moral of the story: Put off for a week or two but no doubt will be up to my old tricks again but maybe I need a hobby.
